<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Seeds of Change by afreezingnote</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25793242">Seeds of Change</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/afreezingnote/pseuds/afreezingnote'>afreezingnote</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Building the New [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Merlin (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Arthur Pendragon Thinks for Himself, Canon Era, F/M, M/M, Multi, Post-Episode: s03e12-13 The Coming of Arthur, Pre-Poly, Pre-Slash</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 09:21:38</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,155</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25793242</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/afreezingnote/pseuds/afreezingnote</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A prequel to Secret of Change from Arthur's POV - The sight of his best men entering the courtyard as they escorted Guinevere home had cheered him. They embodied the dreams he had for his reign. </p><p>In Leon, with his steadfast loyalty, he saw the best of what Camelot had always been. In his new knights, commoners all, he marked the potential of honouring merit above station. In Gwen, his beloved, he recognised the fulfillment of staying true to himself. He would not deny his own heart, as his father wished, and marrying her would reinforce his connection to the people as well. Yet for all that, something was missing.</p><p>Here, alone under the stars, he acknowledged the cause.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Gwen/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Building the New [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1871146</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>48</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Seeds of Change</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Edited and brit-picked by silvermyfanwy. Any mistakes left are my own.</p><p>If it needs to be said, I do not own these characters and make no profit from this work save fun. If this story appears anywhere other than Archive of Our Own, it has been reposted without my consent.</p><p>As we know, Arthur's characterization in the show was not always consistent, but in this house we like to try to fix that. We also like Arthur to think for himself. So, I wrote this in the hope that it would illustrate where Arthur is at mentally even before the added stress of regency and worry for his father's health begins to take its toll on him as it has in Secret of Change.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><em> “Dreams are the seeds of change. Nothing ever grows without a seed, and nothing ever changes without a dream.” </em> —Debby Boone</p><p>For the amount of turmoil they’d all endured in Morgana’s coup and fighting to regain the citadel, life in the city returned to former routines with ease. Damages to the castle were already being assessed, servants had resumed their duties, and the townsfolk continued their normal tasks. All this was to the good, but Arthur couldn’t help feeling disconcerted.</p><p>Sitting on the steps with Merlin now, he struggled to pull himself out of his own thoughts.</p><p>“Have you seen the state of these boots?” Arthur asked.</p><p>“Yeah,” Merlin said.</p><p>“Well, go and get something to clean them.”</p><p>Arthur gave the order to grasp at some sense of normalcy, unsure if he was hoping more for Merlin’s obedience or a snarky challenge.</p><p>“Why? They're your boots.”</p><p>Ah, snark then. There was comfort in the familiarity of their banter, and Arthur could roll with it even though it might have been easier to close himself behind the wall of formality.</p><p>“Have you lost your mind?” he asked.</p><p>“I thought you believed in equality.”</p><p>“I'm sorry?”</p><p>“At the Round Table, you said—”</p><p>“Shut up, Merlin,” Arthur said. </p><p>He shoved Merlin’s shoulder and let his grin peek through the straight-faced demeanor he’d adopted. Merlin huffed a laugh. But the levity of the moment was short-lived. Arthur sighed as he relented to the melancholy course his mind determined to wander.<br/>
<br/>
As always, Merlin sensed his mood and asked, “How's your father?”</p><p>“I don't know,” Arthur admitted. “All this—Morgana—it's hit him hard.”</p><p>“Perhaps we're heading for a new time,” Merlin said, not quite able to keep the hint of hope out of his voice. “You may need to take charge, become—become king.”</p><p>That was the heart of the issue, wasn’t it? Merlin hit on it with his unusual knack for clarity in troubling times and his constant, ever-puzzling faith, which warmed and unnerved Arthur in equal measure.</p><p>“Who knows what the future will bring.”</p><p>
  <strong>---:|||:---</strong>
</p><p>Though Arthur hadn’t had a great number of items on his schedule, the day had felt long. When evening finally came, he’d ordered a bath, which Merlin had mercifully heated enough to relax some of the tension in his muscles. Still soaking, Arthur looked over his shoulder as Merlin opened the wardrobe.</p><p>“Not the nightshirt yet,” he said. “I think I’m going to take a walk when I’m done.”</p><p>Wordlessly, Merlin obliged, selecting an older set of clothes to drape over the changing screen.</p><p>“Would you like me to stay until you return?” Merlin asked.</p><p>“No, you should go home. No doubt the courtiers will be relentless tomorrow. I need you well-rested for the morning,” Arthur said. “Thank you, Merlin.”</p><p>The smile was audible in Merlin’s voice as he wished Arthur a good night.</p><p>
  <b>---:|||:---</b>
</p><p>As Arthur strolled along the ramparts, his father’s vacant stare haunted him, compelling his thoughts inexorably toward the future. Some of what would come, he could not regret. He’d once said to his father that he believed a royal’s duty lay in serving the people, and a distant king could not do so, not fully. The sight of his best men entering the courtyard as they escorted Guinevere home had cheered him. They embodied the dreams he had for his reign. </p><p>In Leon, with his steadfast loyalty, he saw the best of what Camelot had always been. In his new knights, commoners all, he marked the potential of honouring merit above station. In Gwen, his beloved, he recognised the fulfillment of staying true to himself. He would not deny his own heart, as his father wished, and marrying her would reinforce his connection to the people as well. Yet for all that, something was missing.</p><p>Here, alone under the stars, he acknowledged the cause.</p><p>Arthur had spoken truly at the Round Table of the Ancient Kings. They could not have succeeded in their aims without everyone present. Merlin, his dearest friend and staunchest support, had proven essential dozens of times over throughout the crisis. Without him, Arthur would have gone recklessly to his death before the barest scrap of a plan could be hatched. Without him, Arthur could not have centered himself enough to have made a difference.</p><p>He knew there were things that Merlin did not tell him, but he couldn’t understand how Merlin slipped back into his duties as a servant with no more than a token protest couched in jest. </p><p>Merlin had been right to remark on his espousement of equality earlier that afternoon.</p><p>Elyan, Gwaine, Lancelot, and Percival had already received an elevation in status. Guinevere would one day be queen. If the council named Arthur regent, as surely they must if his father did not recover quickly, Leon would be promoted to First Knight. Yet the man most deserving of praise would accept going unrewarded.</p><p>However, deep down, Arthur understood Merlin avoided notice purposefully. His reasons for shirking the limelight went unexamined along with the other secrets between them, but Arthur also knew that part of Merlin wanted more. More from life and more from Arthur. Merlin longed for the same things Arthur rarely acknowledged.</p><p>The immediate flare of heat between them when they had met had been obvious and undeniable. Arthur had indulged that fire in his private fantasies and had wondered if Merlin did the same. But they had never acted on it. As their antagonistic acquaintance had morphed into true friendship, the trust between them had also deepened in a way that remained unspoken as well. Arthur never even named it in his mind.</p><p>He had expected his love for Gwen to eclipse any romantic stirrings he’d harbored before, but his feelings for Merlin had endured, each growing equally in his heart, both as sincere as the other. This duality left him conflicted and unsure. Would it be better to talk with Guinevere about it, or should he attempt to ignore it entirely as he had tried to do already? Communication, in regard to personal vulnerability, at least, was not his strong suit.</p><p>As Arthur grew up, his father had dismissed, discouraged, and sometimes punished expressions of emotion. Uther insisted that the crown would require him to live aloof and friendless. Instinct told Arthur to believe the opposite. This ill-conceived instruction was not alone among his father’s failings. It was one point in a long list of topics to contemplate as the mantle of leadership settled on his shoulders.</p><p>Above the distant treeline, a light streaked across the sky. Arthur tracked it with his eyes. Instead of wishing on it, he made a vow. For himself and for his people, he would strive to live up to the potential Merlin, Guinevere, and his closest knights saw in him. If he could grow to deserve their hope and belief, he might indeed become a worthy king.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading! Feedback is always welcome. If you'd like any additional tags included or spot any errors, please let me know, and I'll update asap.</p><p>Chapter 2 of the next part of this series, Secret of Change, is finished and in the process of revision. I'll be posing it asap!</p><p>If you'd like to find me on tumblr, unmarkedinlife is my Merlin blog where you'll find this <a href="https://unmarkedinlife.tumblr.com/post/625929091325034496/seeds-of-change-pairing-arthurgwen">attention-grabber graphic</a> that you could reblog, if you were so inclined. I follow from balaszafiros.</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>